Assquatch
Unhinged — rare
Creature — Donkey
Sets Assquatch has been printed in:
Unhinged — rare
Creature — Donkey
Sets Assquatch has been printed in:
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Creature — Elemental (2/5)
Whenever Red-Hot Hottie deals damage to a creature, put a third-degree-burn counter on that creature. It gains "At the beginning of each end step, sacrifice this creature unless you scream 'Aaah!' at the top of your lungs."
Creature — Slug (3/1)
Super haste (This may attack the turn before you cast it. (You may put this card from your hand onto the battlefield tapped and attacking during your declare attackers step. If you do, you lose the game at the beginning of your next turn's end step unless you pay this card's mana cost during that turn.))
Creature — Beast (0/0)
As Six-y Beast enters the battlefield, you secretly put six or fewer +1/+1 counters on it, then an opponent guesses the number of counters. If that player guesses right, sacrifice Six-y Beast after it enters the battlefield.
Creature — Goblin Warrior (2/2)
Say "Goblin S.W.A.T. Team": Put a +1/+1 counter on Goblin S.W.A.T. Team unless an opponent swats the table within five seconds. Activate only once each turn.
Creature — Basilisk (3/5)
Whenever Stone-Cold Basilisk blocks or becomes blocked by a creature with fewer letters in its name, destroy that creature at end of combat. (Punctuation and spaces aren't letters.)
Whenever an opponent reads Stone-Cold Basilisk, that player is turned to stone until end of turn. Stoned players can't attack, block, cast spells, or activate abilities.
Creature — Human Wizard (2/3)
: Target permanent's artist becomes the artist of your choice until end of turn.
Legendary Creature — Elephant Rogue (2/3)
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may ask target player a yes-or-no question. If you do, that player answers the question truthfully and abides by that answer if able until end of turn.
Creature — Elemental? (3/4)
Did you know this creature has flying?
Are you aware that any time you say something that isn't a question, when a player points out this fact first, they gain control of Question Elemental?
Creature — Drake (2/3)
Flying
When Double Header enters the battlefield, you may return target permanent with a two-word name to its owner's hand.
Creature — Giant (0/2)
, , Sacrifice a creature: Pygmy Giant deals X damage to target creature, where X is a number in the sacrificed creature's text box.
Enchantment — Aura // Creature — Penguin (0/0)
Enchant creature
Curse of the Fire Penguin consumes and confuses enchanted creature.
Curse of the Fire Penguin Creature
Trample
When this creature dies, return Curse of the Fire Penguin to the battlefield.
Creature — Monkey (1/1)
As Monkey Monkey Monkey enters the battlefield, choose a letter.
Monkey Monkey Monkey gets +1/+1 for each nonland permanent whose name begins with the chosen letter.
Creature — Orc Paratrooper (4/4)
When Orcish Paratroopers enters the battlefield, flip it from a height of at least one foot. Sacrifice Orcish Paratroopers unless it turns over completely at least once during the flip and lands face up.
Creature — Treefolk (3/3)
Shoe Tree enters the battlefield with up to two shoe counters on it. Use your shoes as counters.
Shoe Tree gets +1/+1 for each shoe counter on it.
Creature — Zombie (4/4)
The Fallen Apart enters the battlefield with two arms and two legs.
Whenever damage is dealt to The Fallen Apart, remove an arm or a leg from it.
The Fallen Apart can't attack if it has no legs and can't block if it has no arms.
Creature — Elephant Townsfolk (1/4)
Whenever you cast a spell, you may gain ½ life for each word in that spell's name.
Creature — Beast (3/3)
Gotcha — If an opponent says "creature" or "guy," you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Creature Guy from your graveyard to your hand.
Creature — Donkey Barbarian (4/2)
At the beginning of your upkeep, flip a coin. If you lose the flip, target opponent chooses whether Dumb Ass attacks this turn.
Creature — Beast (5/5)
As Gluetius Maximus enters the battlefield, an opponent chooses one of your fingers. (Thumbs are fingers, too.)
When the chosen finger isn't touching Gluetius Maximus, sacrifice Gluetius Maximus.
Creature — Human Child (2/3)
As Meddling Kids enters the battlefield, choose a word with four or more letters.
Spells with the chosen word in their text box can't be cast.
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